A Personal Rant

Do you consider yourself successful?  That was the hot-button question that my husband asked me last night.  I wasn’t prepared for how hard that question would hit me.   I Stammered.  I danced around in my mind trying to figure out what that meant exactly.  I tried to say yes, but somehow it came unconvincing – and it made me sad.  That must mean that the answer is no, right?

After giving it more thought, I’m still grasping for greater understanding about this one. Yes, I have most certainly had successes in my life – some pretty cool ones.  I was the first person in my family to graduate from college. I worked in the extremely fast paced and demanding field of television news for years. Then went on to a talk show where I worked myself up from a production assistant to the actual Producer of the show – a show that became nationally syndicated.  I felt inspired to write a book, which I completed after four years of mastering an entirely new learning curve, and even managed to ghostwrite another one that was picked up by a traditional publisher in the meantime.

Personally, I’ve been married to my high school sweetheart for over 24 years (a rare success all its own) and together we’ve raised two sons – kept them safe, healthy and encouraged.  But most of all, I feel as if I’ve become more aware of and closer to the loving and mysterious power that rules the world. I’ve learned to see it at work in my daily life and at times it’s filled my heart to overflowing with the most wonderful, all consuming kind of love.  It’s taught me to delight in the simplest of pleasures – beauty, nature, laughter and those rare and special moments of true and deep communication with another human being.  Of all the successes of my life – those are the things that seem to be the most valuable to me.

Due to this new heightened awareness, I’ve changed my way of living.  Instead of making plans and then doggedly going after them, I now choose to silently ask for guidance each day, and then await opportunities and inspirations on where to go next.  I don’t believe in accidents anymore – feel like everything that comes into my life is there for a reason.  And so I look for ways to serve, help or heal.  Since taking on this mindset, many of my old life dilemmas have been solved and miraculous gifts have taken their place.  My husband found the opportunity to leave a job that was draining him, allowing us to move to a new area, improve our financial situation and live in a house that could only be defined as our “dream home” – despite it defying all the odds of a down economy.  One son was accepted into one of the best schools in the state, and the other has called the move to this new city “the best thing that ever happened to him.”  Miracles supplied in direct response to our daily desires.  That is truly a success.

Yet, I stammered at the question “do you consider yourself successful.”  With all that I’ve previously stated, why wasn’t my answer a quick, easy and even joyous yes?

Available on Amazon.comEarlier this week I wrote about an insightful personality test that I’d taken – and I must say that’s it’s given me some food for thought.  My “personality type” is an INFJa person continually committed to personal growth and the desire to make the world a better place.  Yes, that certainly does describe the motivation behind all my life decisions.  But then it also said that “the downfall of this type is that pinning your hopes and happiness on ‘changing the world’ often leads to disillusionment.”  While honorable, it’s too big and can lead to an underlying sense of disappointment.  When I read that I felt another twinge of my soul. Am I subconsciously withholding my own approval of myself contingent upon this book becoming a popular best-seller?  That certainly does cheapen the heartfelt place from which it was written – and probably doom me to disappointment.  Not a great revelation.

It’s funny how one, simple question can open up your view.  Make you see things in a new way.  Years ago while struggling with the writing of the book, someone very insightful told me “I think you’re trying to express your spirituality AND satisfy some past goal. Maybe has something to do with your parents.”  Maybe.

Although I’ve healed tremendously – it still seems that there’s more healing to be done.  My response to my well-meaning friend was this:

My truest intention with the book is this: I want to help people shed their pain and release the torment of their souls – I KNOW that it’s beneath us. It stands in the way of the truest most authentic expression of our beings. Intuitively, I feel like I’ve been given this task to face my own demons head-on.  Although my own insecurities may be my biggest challenge to overcome, they’re also what give me the heartfelt intention to express this message. Instead of thinking of this as weakness, I should think of it as a necessary road to lead me where I NEED to go. The pain gives me humbled insight, the motivation to search for solutions and share them, and a gracious spirit.

Looks like I’ll stay true to my personality type and continue on my lifelong path to learn and grow. Whether the book succeeds or fails isn’t up to me, I’ve earnestly done my part there, but my greatest accomplishment will not be achieved until I can be asked the question “Do you consider yourself a success?” And resounding and wholeheartedly answer, YES!

Copyright © 2013 marciwise.com. Material is copyrighted but free to repost as long as proper credit is listed, including our website address. Marci Wise is the author of Pain, Passion & Purpose. “Like” us on Facebook.

The Free Test that will Change your Life

Let’s face it, it’s a huge world full of infinite possibilities.  When choosing a career direction it can be difficult to commit to just one that seems like the perfect fit.  Add the fact that most of us have multiple interests, and it can be almost impossible to discern which path will lead to your greatest happiness. And even if you do make a pretty good decision, you can’t help but look back longingly at the other options you left behind.  At least that’s the way it’s always been for me.

English: Carl Gustav Jung, full-length portrai...Recently I came across the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, (also known as the Jung Typology Test), and I think it is outstanding.  Oh how I wish I’d taken this test years ago. It would have saved me years of wondering if I was on the right track (turns out I was) and helped me to know where to place my energies in order to be the most effective.

This short questionnaire was developed by a mother/daughter team, Katharine Cook Briggs and Isabel Briggs Myers, based on the work of Swiss Psychotherapist Carl Jung.  Its strength lies in measuring how each individual person perceives the world and makes decisions.  By taking this test you’ll discover your personality type, illustrated by four letters, which reflects your own personal expression of sensation, intuition, feeling, and thinking. Then, based on your type, the test recommends professions that will utilize your unique strengths and offer you deeper fulfillment.

Fictional couple Luke Spencer and Laura Webber...Reading your type description resembles a horoscope on steroids, except that it’s based on concrete information that you yourself have provided.  Since its suggestions reflect your truest nature, it can help you avoid being swept away by the superficial passions of the moment. When I was 17-years-old and caught up in the “Luke & Laura” craze, I briefly flirted with the thought of setting out for Hollywood in search of my big break on General Hospital. While I may have been passionate about the show – this test has confirmed that would most certainly NOT have been a wise decision! (Sorry Luke, our love just wasn’t meant to be!)

By taking the test, I found out that I’m an INFJ– the rarest of all types representing on one percent of the population.  (Oh, so that explains it…) INFJ’s are big picture people who are always searching for ways to improve themselves and the world around them. They thrive on inspiring others and helping them find purpose or meaning. Writing, counseling, teaching and public service are areas where INFJ’s frequently find their niche.So it looks like I’ve been on the right track after all.  (Good to know). Examining your results is fun because these definitions go beyond simply suggesting careers – and can also shed light on other aspects of your life.  Once you’ve discovered your personality type, a simple internet search will turn up plenty of interesting information about you as a parent, a partner and a person.

fancy logo/writing for use in MBTI articles

I took the test three times, from three different sources, and consistently came up with the same answer.  I recommend that you do the same to ensure that you find the correct type.

 

Below I’ve supplied links to three different free versions of the test:

Similar Minds

Jungian Types Test

HumanMetrics

Once you’ve discovered your own personality type, please come back here and leave a comment sharing your type and thoughts about the test.  Are you already on the right track – or do you need to do some fine-tuning?  Sometimes having just a little more insight on a situation can make all the difference. Let us know!  Good luck!

Copyright © 2013 marciwise.com. Material is copyrighted but free to repost as long as proper credit is listed, including our website address. Marci Wise is the author of Pain, Passion & Purpose. “Like” us on Facebook.

Feelin’ the Love

Author: BagandeFor today’s blog, I fully intended to tell you about this amazing test that I came across that helps you better understand yourself, narrow down your career options and have a better chance of living a happy life while fulfilling your own unique purpose.  Oh, how I wish I’d found this years ago.  And I definitely will tell you about it – but not today.  Today I feel inspired to talk about love.  Not just because it’s Valentine’s Day here in the U.S. but simply because I feel the world needs to place more importance on love.

 

In our busy world it seems like we’ve shrunk love down to simply the romantic kind of love felt between couples.  But love is so much bigger than that.  Love is that spark of recognition that makes us feel drawn to other people.  It’s the unexplainable appreciation of someone else’s wonderful qualities.  In fact, love doesn’t even have to be geared towards another person.  We can be swept away by an overwhelming feeling of “love” while taking in the amazing beauty of a sunset, or witnessing the joyous giggle of child.

 

Happy Valentine's Day!
Happy Valentine’s Day! (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

With New Year’s over and our resolutions well under way, it seems that experiencing and expressing more love in our lives may actually be the most important improvement we could make. If the details of our lives are a painting – then love is the thing that brings it to life with vibrant color. It makes what we do matter. 

My son is doing something that really impresses me today.  For the second Valentine’s Day in a row, he’s bought a heap full of cards, written uplifting statements on them, and will be handing them out at school to girls who haven’t received anything – because he says that “everyone deserves to feel special.”  I love that! And we do, don’t we? Valentine’s Day brings that message to the forefront of our minds, but really, we deserve to feel special every day.  Kudos to my 16-year-old son for seeing a need and stepping up!

 

As a funny aside, while that may seem very enlightened for a teenaged boy, when buying the cards he impatiently grabbed handfuls of them without taking time to read the messages – so some of them say “to my husband”  or are a tad suggestive in nature.  Ha!  That should liven up the conversation at school!  (I’m expecting a concerned call from the Principal at any moment.)  But it’s the intention that counts – and making someone smile and feel appreciated is an awesome thing.  I’d love to see the face of the girl who gets the card where he’s written “You’re strong, intelligent and beautiful – are you a Beaver, ‘cause ‘dam!’”

 

So this blog is a call to action.  When you see something wonderful in someone, tell them!  We all desire to be seen.  It’s a shame when we live in a world where we have to feel guarded against saying something nice to someone else.  I say we challenge that, step outside of our pre-programmed way of living, and reach out to others with an uplifting word and a kind acknowledgement.  Who knows, someone else may do the same for you – and it could just make your day!

 

Copyright © 2013 marciwise.com. Material is copyrighted but free to repost as long as proper credit is listed, including our website address. Marci Wise is the author of Pain, Passion & Purpose. “Like” us on Facebook.